Ham sandwich in a synagogue?

Ok, so disclaimer up front: I haven't really thought this out, so this might be all over the place, or not make sense, or not even reach a conclusion at the end.

In Romans 12:1-2, Paul (an apostle of Christ Jesus) says, "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing, and perfect will."

In Romans 14, Paul talks about how, despite the fact that no food is unclean in and of itself, some brothers and sisters will still be distressed if they see you eating certain things. For example, munching a ham sandwich in a synagogue would be frowned upon by those around you. Back in the day, people who converted to Christianity had trouble fully letting go of their past lives...oh, wait, we still have that problem. So the Jewish people who converted to Christianity at the outset of the Christian church still adhered to some of the religious tenants of Judaism, including the eating restrictions.

So with these things in mind, here we go...

I've been thinking, maybe this whole "being in the world but not of the world" thing is bigger than I realized. It isn't just not sleeping around, not stumbling around slobbering drunk, not killing people, not lashing out at people, not not not...you get the idea. It's not just avoiding obviously mean or morally questionable things. Some examples I've encountered in the last couple weeks that I never thought of in this light before:

1. A friend of mine who has been a cherished Christian brother in my life for years has developed the habit of cussing when he is mad or when it makes an effective punch line. If you ask him why he lets himself do this, he makes a convincing and effective argument about the fact that they are just words, that the disciples and people in the Bible probably didn't have the "cleanest" mouths (they were a bunch of working class guys, after all), and that it makes him more approachable to those who don't know the Lord.

But here's the thing: a lot of people, Christians and non-Christians alike, will judge him unfairly because of that. Many Christians will question his devotion to the Lord, or in the extreme, even his salvation. Is that fair? No, of course it isn't. Many non-Christians will fail to see the difference between him and themselves. Is that accurate? No, he is very different. But many people will perceive him badly because of it.

"I don't care what people think," might be what my friend would say to me. Well, good for you, but God does. We are vessels of his Son, and even if you have a valid argument for allowing yourself to cuss, ultimately it will cause your brothers and sisters in Christ (not all, but some) to stumble; they will judge you, and not be able to share in Christ with you as effectively as they would if you didn't cuss. The non-Christians will stumble as well, and unfortunately they'll be stumbling on their way to Jesus.

2. A couple weeks ago, I talked to a guy who said he looked forward to being married, not only because he wants to find a woman who he loves to be his wife, but also because then he can do child care at church or play with young kids without people questioning his motives. Somehow, when a guy has kids, he automatically becomes small-kid-safe. This guy loves kids, loves to play with them and love on them and show them the love of Jesus, but unfortunately he has encountered suspicion in the past about his intentions toward young kids. That is a sad and terrible thing, and a grim picture of the world we live in.

So what should he do? My first instinct was, "You love kids, you have nothing but the best intentions, so screw what people think, you're not doing anything wrong. Keep it up, kids need strong male figures in their lives." But I don't think that's right. It's not completely right, I should say. If the parents of the kid know and trust him, or he is a part of an organized effort like coaching baseball through the Boys and Girls Club, or something like that, then he can minister to kids within safe confines and a positive environment.

But he should be very cautious, because the last thing he wants is for people to know he is a Christian and then to subsequently think he is a pervert. Is it possible that he'll get screwed some day anyway, and someone will falsely accuse him? Sure, but he shouldn't invite that possibility. We have to do what we can in this world because when people perceive us, to some extent, they are also perceiving Christ.

3. Ok, time to get personal: I am an affectionate person, and for me, that often manifests in physical touch: hugs, squeezing someone's hand, touching a person's hand or leg or shoulder when I speak to him or her, even kisses on the cheek sometimes.

Unfortunately, in this day and age, people often misconstrue physical touch. And even if they aren't misunderstanding my intentions, they are still uncomfortable simply because it invades their personal space. In society today, especially in America, people don't like to be touched frequently. It puts them off, even if only for a second.

My natural reaction to this is, "Well, it's just the way I am, and I'm only loving on people, so what's the problem?" The problem is it makes others uncomfortable, or makes them think I mean more in my gestures then I do. So what should I do? Like the example in number 2, I have to be cautious and considerate. I should figure out what level of physical touch people appreciate, and it is different with everyone. That's part of my challenge: in my life, I've been around people who give me a big hug and a kiss when they see me, and other people who only greet with a smile. Neither is wrong, they're just different. What I need to learn is not to feel slighted when all I get is the latter, and to know when what people want or need is a big hug, and when all they want or need is a kind word and a reassuring look.

One last example...last night, I saw a production of The Diary of Anne Frank. Spoiler alert! The Nazis find them in the end, after the family has been hiding for over two years, and all but the father eventually die. When I got back to my dorm, I was discussing the show with a friend, and I commented simply, "Nazis suck."

I don't think there is anyone in the world who would dane to refute that point. It's a pretty universally felt sentiment. I've never actually heard a person say, "You're not a very good Christian because you hate Nazis." It just isn't a common arguement.

But the truth is hate is hate, and it's wrong. Jesus died for every single Nazi, and for Hitler, just as much as he did for me, and he loved them just as much as he does me, and repentance was as available and complete for them as it is for me.

My point is that there are things in this world that are justifiable or even purely good, but just because we know that doesn't mean everyone does, and if it is going to cause people to stumble, we should tread lightly (remember Romans 14). Just because we are not of this world doesn't mean we don't still have to live in this world, and sometimes we may have to be restrained because of the corruptness of this world so that the love of Jesus can be revealed in people's lives (remember Romans 12).

But also, sometimes bad things are going to be thought about people in the Body (particularly in cases like examples 2 and 3), and in those instances we just have to take heart that Jesus loves and understands us.

And like in example 4, sometimes we are going to do things that seem completely right to us and to the world, but as unconceivable as it might be, that's not what Jesus would have us do, and so we have to continually seek his heart.

I think that's the point of all of this: we need Jesus' heart for the world. Jesus wouldn't ever get up on a soapbox at the expense of people and their understanding of God's love (as was the tendency in examples 1, 2, and 3). Love is his goal. But he doesn't force his love on people, and he doesn't only express it in one way. And despite the temptation, Jesus avoided cussing or condemning even the worst of sinners (he had some harsh words for religious hypocrites, but that's another blog for another time), and why? Because those things would contradict who he is, and because he lives in us, they contradict who we are in Him.

Why did I write this? I don't know. Will anyone read it, or take anything away from it? I don't know that either. I don't know a lot of things, but what I do know is that I want Jesus' heart of love so that I can love Him and other people, and so I can have mercy and grace for everyone, including myself.

So my prayer today is simply this: "Jesus, give me more of your heart! Give me more of your mind! I want to know you! And I want to enter into your rest, trusting that you live in me, and that all that I am, all that is good in me, is from you. Help me to know you more, and to have your peace which surpasses understanding. In Jesus' name, amen."